There is an animal called the skunk, sometimes mistakenly called a polecat. The skunk is a member of the mustelidae family, which family also includes stoats, ferrets, and weasels, among others. Warner Brothers has created a lovable, if misguided, cartoon version of the skunk and named him Pepé Le Pew.
Skunks are myopic, and often perceive any moving thing that they don’t see clearly as an enemy. Since their vision is so short-range, that can include a lot of things.
Because they have such bad vision, Nature has gifted them with an extraordinary method of defense: when threatened, they first raise their tail to expose their backside, and stomp their front feet as a warning. If this warning is ignored, they hike their buttocks into the air and spray a foul stench (chemically, 1-butanethiol) that tends to clear the area of anyone, enemy or not.
Essentially, a skunk stomps petulantly, shows its backside, and raises a stink.
I have this feeling that somehow, back in time, the DNA of a few people in this world somehow became contaminated by skunk DNA. They exhibit very similar characteristics:
- Their vision (physical or mental) is so impaired that they have trouble seeing just about anything clearly.
- Anything they can’t see clearly or understand is immediately wrong, evil, or threatening.
- Their first reaction to anything perceived as threatening (whether it really is or not) is to show their worst side and make noisy threats.
- If the perceived threat doesn’t go away, they show their butts even more and raise an unholy stink that is both disgusting and indiscriminate as to who it effects.
Sadly, these Skunk People are not so charming and debonaire as Pepé Le Pew.
If you think you know someone like this, or maybe a group of people like this, I’d like to know. Leave a comment here, and if you feel so inclined, name the person or group you feel has those skunky characteristics. (I take no resposibility for libelous comments—you’re on your own!)